Is This Modest?

There are a lot of ladies out there that are very uncomfortable talking about the issue of modesty. To them it means no cute clothes, no fashion, and lots of frump. One of the arguments I’ve heard many times is “why is it our problem anyway?”

Yes, it’s true…the reason that modesty is an issue is because of the way that men can perceive us because of what we are wearing. That sounds like the man’s problem, doesn’t it? And in a way, it is.

There is nothing that can force a man to have pure thoughts—it is completely up to him. It is something that they all struggle with, especially if they want to remain free from immoral thoughts and lust. There are men out there that will lust after a woman if she is covered from chin to toes in a burlap sack, and I am not sure there is anything that we as women could do about that except do our best to avoid these men.

When a man is that lacking of morals we are only required to do our part.

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Although a good portion of modesty is in a person’s demeanor, amount of skin shown, etc., association as a lot to do with redirecting others’ thoughts toward you as a person or you as an object.  If you wear pants with the word “Juicy” across the back, even if the pants themselves are modest, I’ll give you one guess where guys’ minds are going to go.

I love big cats, I think they’re a beautiful part of God’s creation.  If you could tame a tiger, I would own one.  That’s just all there is to it, I’m crazy about cats.  I’d decorate my house in animal print if my husband would let me get away with it.  But would I wear it?  Although I’m fine with coats, bags, etc. trimmed in animal print, I stay away from articles of clothing which use the animal print too heavily.  Why?  Because, in my own mind, I unintentionally associate animal print with “bad girls.”  I know this isn’t true, plenty of wholesome women wear animal print and wear it well, but in my own mind, I can’t help but feel a little bit tacky while wearing it.
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One of the interesting things that I’ve found about clothing is that it’s interesting what the different sexes can and cannot wear in the realms of crossovers.  For the most part, a woman can get away with wearing a man’s shirt and pants¹ and they look cute, but if a man were to wear something that belongs to a woman (say a skirt or dress) it’s usually only for a laugh—or in a kilt.

So, the other day, when Jennifer Sabin made the following comment, I had to think it over…

If she buttoned another button though, then the shirt would lose most of its femininity and she might as well be wearing a man’s shirt. Plus, another button probably wouldn’t be flattering to the shape of her face.

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1. I’m sure, by now you’ve heard of the boyfriend pants – warning, links to GAP commercial with people dancing in underwear. [↩]

This is one of those questions where I know some would want me to say “10 square feet” and they would be happy, but it would mean nothing.  To me, the question of skin is specifically tied to the area that you’re of the body that you are discussing, and can be rendered moot simply by wearing something tight that does not show skin.

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One of the things that makes Is This Modest? different from any other site that I’ve seen on modesty is the fact that we seek to illustrate for you just what is and what is not modest not only with words, but with photographs.

However, this presents specific challenges on multiple levels:

• We don’t want to offend people with grossly immodest photographs.
• We want to illustrate the borderline.
• It’s extremely helpful to have a guy doing some of these reviews, because girls do not see things like guys do.

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